Winter Light

DSC_0589

I am a native of the Pacific Northwest. I have lived through nearly three decades of these winters.

Late sunrises, early sunsets. Bare naked trees, white-topped mountains. Quiet blizzards, drizzling skies.

Twenty-eight years into this life and I am finally starting to see the world around me.

Like, really really see it. Not just see it, but savor it.

The layers of gray and blue. The softness of the sun as it shines from the south. Filtered yellow highlighting the edges.

I notice my latitude on the planet.

A visit to Iceland in 2011 helped me to appreciate the beauty of the north. Travel will do that to you. Travel will help you see your own home through a sharper lens.

The Pacific Northwest takes on a different hue in the winter. She becomes dark and still, mysterious and hopeful.

I do not operate on a separate continuum from this earth and her seasons. I am this earth, I am her seasons.

I become a different person in the winter. I take refuge indoors. I hibernate. I hide.

And I am cold. My nose, my fingers, my toes. I bundle up, I still get cold. The bath water never stays hot for long enough.

I wear my parka inside. I sit on top of space heaters in my big and drafty 110 year-old home on the crest of a hill.

But when I look through the tall leaded windows facing the south, framing the rising and setting sun, a knowing rises like the cream to the top.

I belong here. In this blue and gray world punctuated by brightness. A student of the seasons.

The winter light subdues the fire inside of me. This is a time for becoming. The quiet before the rebirth.

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.”

- Albert Camus

IMG_2362

photo 4-1

photo 2-2

About these ads

8 comments

  1. This is beautiful and absolutely speaks to me. I’ve been living in New Zealand for nearly 2 years now, and these kinds of realizations about the physical world around me and my place in it have become regular occurrences. I love this line: “I am this earth, I am her seasons.” That’s IT! Yes yes yes.

    1. Can you get further from the states than New Zealand? Are you even from the states? For some reason I think you are. If so it’s amazing that you put yourself on the opposite side of the globe. I can imagine that would spark all sorts of mind opening goodness. I mean…Christmas in the summer?? I’d like to experience that some day.

      1. I am from the states. And yes, heaps of mind opening goes on, especially after you shrug off the culture shock. I wholly recommend New Zealand in general, specifically around Christmas, because it’s so beautiful and the country basically shuts down to celebrate — which means go to the beach repeatedly, for us. It’s not a bad life :)

    1. Light is magic. Tonight I’m marveling at the moonlight on a rippling lake. Earlier today I decided that “partly sunny” (or is it “partly cloudy?”) is underrated. The light moving through clouds takes my breath away. Even my three year-old daughter wanted to talk about the sky. My name means “light” and for this I am grateful.

  2. I just read through the last ten entries here, Lucy. You are a beautiful writer with the insight to capture the small yet significant aspects of life.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s