I have so many thoughts swirling in and out of my consciousness…thoughts about motherhood and careers and the little beauties of life.
Such as the dilemma of sleep. When to co-sleep, when to move her to her own bed. When to night wean, when to nurse around the clock. When to let her cry, when to hold her close.
There’s the other dilemma of time. Not enough time to give each project its proper chance. Wondering, if I close my eyes and jump, will I drown or will I keep my head above water? Praying and trusting that if I take it one day at a time, one moment at a time, everything will always be okay.
Then there are the simple things that don’t offer any problems, only pleasures. A soothing, fragrant cup of tea. Games of peek-a-boo and tickles. Quiet time in the rocking chair, nursing and meditating and breathing. Lunch with good friends. Shopping for food and preparing fresh, colorful meals. Long kisses. A walk through my mother’s spring blooms.
(She’s always loved dirt.)