The Vertigo of Freedom

The beauty and the danger in living Now is that we are free as birds yet completely confined within the boxes we have drawn. It is our privilege to draw them, a responsibility that often leaves us dizzy with freedom.

After engaging with a man on Facebook about race, I felt both empowered and powerless to raise awareness about social issues. Where do we start when we are like lost ants who cannot see into tomorrow or beyond the earth’s curve?

We start where we are.

I start in my home. My children live in privileged America, where the schools are good and the opportunities are plentiful. But I don’t want to raise humans who feel entitled, who think that privilege is the norm, who deny problems they haven’t personally experienced.

I don’t know how to do this, so I’m making it up as I go along.

We talk about the homeless population in San Francisco with compassion. It could happen to anyone though it often comes to excessive drug users.

We talk about what it means to be hungry. When you are hungry, every thing becomes a lot harder. Including finding a job.

We talk about prison. Sometimes grown ups make mistakes they can’t take back. Sometimes imprisonment is wrong or unfair. Sometimes it is necessary.

We talk about the value of a dollar. You need to earn the toy.

We talk about giving away money. You can help children in need.

My husband and I have many more difficult subjects to broach with our children before they grow up. Everything in time. Meanwhile, we try to apologize when we are wrong. We try to own our failures. We try to practice honesty in all ways. We spin in circles and lose our balance, all the while looking for the next right turn. We keep drawing new lines, and stepping over them. We keep seeing the bad in the world, we keep reaching beyond it, into the abyss of good.

I am easily distracted by freedom, the idea that I can do anything and be anything and say anything, and I should do more and be more and say more and above all I should learn more. But in reality, I have quite a lot of work to do right here, within these walls.

This is day 25 of 30 consecutive days of blogging. I’m glad you’re along for the ride. If you liked this post, please share using the buttons below. If you have something to add, feel free to comment openly or anonymously.

To read more of my thoughts on womanhood, mindfulness and the creative life, please follow the blog or subscribe via feedburner.



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